Weather me happy

San Diego probably has the nicest weather of any place I have lived. Granted, that while I have moved well over 55 times, most (all) were within California.

Still, I have visited many a state, and still think SD has the most wonderful, moderate weather year round. And as I was reading about the snow, causing school to be cancelled, building snowmen, and all of the shoveling and snow plowing…I was elated to live in SD on this early spring like day (77 degrees F).

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Snails pace

I have always been a slow mover. I am a runner, but a painstakingly slow one. My marathon time in 2004 was just over 6 hours. Not bad for 26.2 miles, but still embarrassingly slow.

I am slow to make decisions, and often times have trouble making them on the spot. I like to take my time and think things over, ponder different variables, and talk them through. I can make on the fly decisions, I just prefer not to.

When I decided I wanted to be a Mom, I never once thought that this aspect of my life would change. In fact, I thought that this would be one of the benefits. I was clearly mistaken. Not only was I mistaken, but I was downright wrong.

I have been meeting a few girlfriends for play dates lately, and I am shocked at how fast kids move from one thing to the next. Play, cry, eat, potty, nurse, nap, diaper change, eat again, play, cry, nurse again…you get the picture. I can hardly keep up, and when I do I often feel like the gal in The Exorcist whose head spun around on her shoulders. I can barely hold a conversation with my Mommy friends, I cant focus or concentrate on my kid, and I have no idea what I talked about or did while we were together. My girlfriend and I were laughing because I told her how excited I was to see her and her girls, but that getting together wasn’t as fun as I thought it was going to be… She understood what I meant, and didn’t take it personally. In fact, she felt the same way.

Obviously, I also lack the ability to multi-task. I will have to cross that off of my resume. To top it off, when I get home my purse if full of diapers, dirty burp cloths, tissues, an empty water bottle, and trash…hmm, how did that get in there?

Positive thinking or manipulation?

2 thoughts regarding the title. The first is in reference to an issue my boss was having with another employee. He needed to tell her something difficult and I think he told me to get a feel for the delivery of the news. We talked a bit about my thoughts, and subsequently I suspect he refined his delivery, and hopefully today he will be successful delivering the news. The news was bound to hurt her feelings, but depending on how he delivered it…it just might go over well.

The second is our daycare provider; this gal is very clever in her wording. I don’t want to imply that she is lying or manipulative. I don’t feel that way at all. I love this gal, and think she is awesomely wonderful. I feel exceedingly lucky to have found her. But, she is smart in her phrasing and it got me thinking about perspective and positioning. For example, I asked her how she knows what my son wants/needs (food, a nap, a change of scenery), long before he can speak. And her response was, ‘he lets me know’. Now, the first time around, I didn’t think anything of it because I am so accustomed to being around adults who can clearly articulate their needs and wants. But, then when she said it again, I realized she meant that he vocalized himself by either crying or fussing.

As a Mom, of course, this thought is distressing. I never want to know that my son cried, or was uncomfortable in any way. But, by positioning it the way she did, she eased my worries, without me even realizing it. She acted as if his cries were his way of communicating, his way of telling her what he needs. Which (light bulb) they are! Remembering back to Dr. Sears’s books, all of them say that crying is your babies’ way of communicating.

I may sound naive to all the seasoned Moms out there, but this was a timely reminder to me. I have been getting frustrated with Lil E when he cries, especially when it is in the wee hours of the morn’ (he still wakes up at least once a night, but more often two to three times). But, remembering that his cries are his way of telling me he needs something, his way of communicating to me his feelings brings me some comfort. And more importantly, they bring me the patience I need.

Can positioning then and the idea of positive thinking be linked? If you look at a situation and can interpret its meaning in a positive way, aren’t you really just positioning it in a positive light? Some (pessimists) may even threaten that you are manipulating the truth. To me truth isn’t static, since truth is based on perception, personal feelings, and experience.

Rule #1

Yesterday, I was talking with my mommy friends about schools and how to decide which school to send our children too. And I heard myself say–I dont want my kids to go to school with a bunch of poor kids.

Huh? Did I really say that…out loud? Yup, I said it alright. Did I really mean it? Not exactly. But its not like you can take something like that back once you have said it.

Rule number one…think before you speak.

time, where have you gone?

Everyday, several times a day I think to myself…wow, I really should write about this or that. I cant seem to find the time these days. I wonder if I just am not using my time wisely or if I am busier and therefore cant sit down to write…Or maybe blogging just isnt that high of a priority for me these days.

In any case, here I found a few minutes and I am blabbering on about nothing.

I have several things on my mind that I want to talk about and share. But, I cant post about them until I come clean to those people that they effect (or is it affect??). One has been weighing heavy for several weeks, and I was finally able to make a decision. Having made the decision felt very freeing, and the fact that I felt relieved after I decided what to do confirmed that I was making the correct choice. The after math may have me re-thinking it, but I can only do what I feel is right. I will keep you posted on that front.

Lil E is doing very well in daycare so far. He went 2 days this past week, and both days he seemed happy, albeit exhausted when we picked him up.